Life in Two Worlds

-
An elderly man and a young boy sitting together on a couch sharing a moment over a tablet screen, highlighting intergenerational connection.


Three or four times a month, I spend my days in the company of an eight-year-old. Yesterday, though, I sat with an 80-year-old, a regular visit, though never quite often enough.

It strikes me how similar, and yet wildly different, these two worlds can be.

Earlier today, I spent an entire hour trying to get an eight-year-old to put down his tablet and eat his lunch (a struggle that happens far too often). Yesterday, I spent an hour trying to keep an 80-year-old awake. Even with his favorite cowboy movies playing on the TV, he kept gently dozing off. And fair enough: at his age, a quiet afternoon drowsiness is well earned.

An old saying goes, "Once a man, twice a child." But I'm not sure that holds up anymore.

Many kids today seem born ready for the online world, able to track down whatever entertains them in seconds. Books compete harder than ever for their attention. If my 80-year-old loved one was being as a child today I'd have a hard time keeping up with him, We really are living in a whole new era.

Finding Joy in the 15-Minute Moments

With the eight-year-old, 15 minutes is about the limit of his attention span. I spent that quarter-hour playing I Spy, flipping through a picture book to find animals in the sea, air, and on land. (And yes, he's still much better at the game than I am!)

With my elderly loved one, I spent 15 minutes feeding him a bowl of fresh fruit. What he really needed was dry snacks but I humored him. Since he can't get outdoors much anymore, I try to make up for the things he can no longer do for himself.

As I made sure he drank enough water, he got a little grumpy and asked me to turn off the fan because he was feeling chilly and sleepy. To test his awareness, I asked him if he knew what fruits were in his bowl.

"These grapes have seeds!" he said, trying to push them out of his mouth.

"They're supposed to be seedless!" I teased back. Anything to keep the conversation, and his mind, going.

I spent another 15 minutes testing his memory with friendly quiz questions while we watched TV:

  • What country is this gospel singer from?
  • What language is he singing in?
  • Where is this concert being held?

All the while, I kept pushing his water bottle closer so he'd remember to sip, sneaking him a biscuit as a little reward for staying awake.

The Beauty of Both Worlds

My days are spent shifting between these two very different worlds. For everyone who shares these days with me, I am deeply thankful. They give profound meaning to my life and offer endless reasons to reflect and smile.

And when the remaining hours of the day are quiet and I'm left by myself, I feel a deep sense of comfort, warmed by the memories made while caring for both the young and the old.

Navigating the Journey of Caregiving

Caring for an aging loved one comes with unique challenges, tender moments, and quiet lessons in patience. If you're walking a similar path and looking for guidance, practical tips, or gentle encouragement, I wrote a book to help:

Family Care: Navigating Elder Care with Compassion and Wisdom

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

How to Explain a 10-Year Career Gap on Your Resume

-
Image
What Do You Put on a Resume After a 10-Year Career Gap? Learn how to explain a career gap, turn caregiving and self-taught skills into resume strengths, and answer 'What have you been doing?' with confidence. After nearly a decade away from the workforce, I started wondering how to explain a 10-year career gap on my resume. How do you reply to the question: “So, what have you been doing?” A ten-year gap can look enormous on a resume. But a gap in employment doesn't mean a gap in life. Life was happening. I was raising children, caring for family, learning, working on my own projects, and figuring out what came next. If you've stepped away from the workforce to raise children, care for a parent, or deal with life's unexpected turns, you may have more experience to talk about than you realize. Stop apologizing for the gap A career gap isn't a confession, and it doesn't require an apology. You don't have to give an employer a long explanation or defend the ...
Read more

River Crossing

-
Image
  River Crossing after the manner of Robert Frost I'd like to go by the river way again -  not the highway, all heat and hard-topped haste - but the path that loops through the low, green grass, where the cane bends and the birds keep no clock. To walk with bare toes digging into mud, plastic bag stretched overhead like a flag of surrender to weather and wetness - that was the old route, the early road home. There is a bridge, sure - solid, quarter mile upriver, with its rusting nails and rail - but it never felt like mine. A thing built by others who feared the river’s shifting mood. Better to feel the flood’s cold shiver teasing your ribs, or dragging at your knees, than trust to someone else’s timbers. Water, I find, is more honest than men. I was small when I learned to cross alone, though always with eyes from shore watching me - a brother’s, a cousin’s, a neighbor’s glance, or the old man with the limp who smoked leaves and called us fish children. He had a way of knowin...
Read more